Last time I wanted to thank all the people in my life who are there for me.
My father is not one of them.
The last time I spoke to him was around June of last year. I told him that I had to pay the bills for my lawyer and that I had to pay for the court hearing in advance and that I have to borrow money from my grandparents to be able to pay for food.
My father’s answer out of his lounge bed in Ibiza was: Maybe I should go to the social assistence office he is sure the’ll help me.
The last thing I did was to explain him that, no the social system is not going to help me because on paper I am not poor I am just not able to pay the lawyer, the judge, the rent and my food all at the same time and I need help from my family. I never got an answer. Maybe he banged his head while riding his speed boat in Ibizia and forgot to answer. I never talked to him again. Until now he did not talk to me either. Almost an etire year after his heartfelt advice he called me and aksed if I could meet him. I did meet him. He appologized – well, sort of- and then his wife told me about all their holidays and how beautiful it was in Kitzbühel and how much a lobster costs in her favourite restaurant. Not much, really!
One hour after our first meeting in a year he had invited friend to join us. Thank you for the converstaion.To be fair I did not expect anything else of him it is exactly how he behaved his whole life towards me and yet you cannot help but wonder what is going on in this brain? Not much obviously or better nothing that does not concern himself. The most antic statement he produced was that he did not help me because he surmised that – if he would give me any money- I would be content with that money and therefore would not be adamant towards Mr. M ans would not fight that hard for my rights.
Did you get that? Maybe you need to think about that logic for another moment…….
Fun fact, you could totally tell that when he saw I am really angry at his behavious he just made that argument up on the spot thinking that it was really clever. Of course back then I had already told him that I am going to have an appointment at court and that I had to pay it in advance. Too many details, yeah…soryy. Normally I would just tell him to go back to Ibiza and leave me alone but my daughter did ask a few times for her Grandpa Peter and I am okay with him seeing her a few times a year. That is all that’s going to happen but she should at least know he exist. Nothing else is ever going to come out of this.